I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
