Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I've blown a few things in my day
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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