Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
So vagazzling was a success
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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