I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
