You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
