i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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