I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
