Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
The struggles of a small town man whore
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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