why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Randomize
