Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize
