Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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