If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
