yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
