Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
