he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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