I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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