there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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