just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
