You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
