Taylor Swift is so right about you.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
So much rum. So many feels.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
