I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
