He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
