Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
So squirting runs in the family.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
