Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
