I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Randomize
