we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
