Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
