There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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