She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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