you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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