Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
