are you still at the devil's house?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
