I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
