I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
