Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Randomize
