We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
