so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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