I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
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