Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
