That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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