I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
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