i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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