I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
