My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
