My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
