i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
