have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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