i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
