Just fell off a train. Bad.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
