we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Randomize
